Showdown on the banks of the Jabbok

A few weeks ago I was asked to speak in sacrament meeting. My thoughts were a bit too long to give a complete account in a 12 minute talk. I decided it would be nice to put out a version where I said what I wanted to say without a time constraint.

Anyone who has suffered through one of my Sunday School lessons or talks knows I love the scriptures and the insights gained from digging into them. In his talk “Let God Prevail” President Nelson briefly mentioned the context of Jacob’s name change to Israel. I feel like a second look at that event is not only informative, but genuinely inspiring.

Jacob was the son Isaac and grandson of Abraham. He was a twin, and technically the second born, and not the obvious inheritor of the birthright or standard bearer of the covenant. He gained these blessings through a combination of personal ambition on his part and short sighted behavior on the part of his brother Esau. As a result their relationship appears to have suffered from significant strain and we learn in Genesis 27 Jacob left Canaan to find a wife and also because he feared his own brother would murder him (Gen 27:41). On his way out of Canaan, at a place he would name Bethel (The House of God) he experiences a vision and the LORD covenants with him In Genesis 28:13-16  we read

I am the Lord, the God of your grandfather Abraham and the God of your father Isaac. I will give you and your descendants the ground you are lying on. Your descendants will be like the dust of the earth, and you will spread out to the west, east, north, and south. And so all the families of the earth may receive blessings through you and through your descendants. I am with you! I will protect you wherever you go and will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I promised you! (Gen 28: 13-16)

He goes to his Uncle Laban (different from the Book of Mormon villain) in Paddan Aram (modern Iraq) and works hard for 20 years. At the end of two decades he is married, has 11 children, and is incredibly wealthy. He’s comfortable. He doesn’t appear to be in any hurry to rush back to Canaan. Given the circumstances of his departure who would? To a certain extent his wealth comes at the expense of his father-in-law, and Jacob once again fears for his life (Gen 31:1). He is again blessed with revelation where the previously established covenant with The LORD is renewed.

The Lord said to Jacob, “Return to the land of your fathers and to your relatives. I will be with you.” (Gen 31:3)

After gathering his family he quite literally “heads for the hills”. His uncle catches up with him on the banks of the river Jabbok, and after some tense accusations and recrimination they reach a truce. No violence occurs, but part of the truce is the establishment of a strict border. Jacob is to return to Canaan and Laban will return to his home, each man on “his side”. They go so far as to erect a pillar and pile of stones and make sacrifices to mark their covenant.

One of Jacob’s potentially life threatening conflicts has thus been reconciled, but in a way that leaves him in a stressful position. He cannot go back. Because of the new border, he can only move forward. In front of him is the country of his brother Esau. The conflict that started his journeys looms over him even after 20 years. He learns that Esau is coming with 400 men to meet him. Does his brother still seek revenge? Will he need to give him all he has gained to calm his rage? These concerns clearly trouble him because he divides up his flocks with the rationale that perhaps he can pacify his brother by giving him substantial gifts. After making all the preparations he sends his family and flocks across, but spends one last night alone, on the far side of the river. Clearly this homecoming isn’t something he’s enthusiastic about. I believe this is “the crucial turning point” and test of his agency to which President Nelson was referring in his talk. On the one hand Jacob fears for his life. On the other The LORD has commanded him to return home, and covenanted to protect him. A trial of faith and agency indeed. His prayer is recorded for us in Genesis 32:9-12

 “O God of my father Abraham, God of my father Isaac, O Lord, you said to me, ‘Return to your land and to your relatives and I will make you prosper.’ I am not worthy of all the faithful love you have shown your servant. With only my walking stick I crossed the Jordan, but now I have become two camps. Rescue me, I pray, from the hand of my brother Esau, for I am afraid he will come and attack me, as well as the mothers with their children. But you said, ‘I will certainly make you prosper and will make your descendants like the sand on the seashore, too numerous to count.’”

That night he had a visitor. In Genesis 32:24-29 we read:

So Jacob was left alone. Then a man wrestled with him until daybreak. When the man saw that he could not defeat Jacob, he struck the socket of his hip so the socket of Jacob’s hip was dislocated while he wrestled with him. Then the man said, “Let me go, for the dawn is breaking.” 

“I will not let you go,” Jacob replied, “unless you bless me.” 

The man asked him, “What is your name?” 

He answered, “Jacob.”  

“No longer will your name be Jacob,” the man told him, “but Israel, because you have fought with God and with men and have prevailed.”

Then he blessed Jacob there. 

So Jacob named the place Peniel, explaining, “Certainly I have seen God face to face and have survived.”

I’ll take a moment here to point out that here we have a child of God, who flees his birthplace after pursuing a blessing originally denied him, now seeking refuge, navigating the challenges of the mortal world, struggling to resolve conflicts rooted in the very human pursuits of money and status, who is blessed with increased confidence and reassurance through covenant, and given a new name, a series of spiritual gifts, all in the presence of the LORD. I believe these circumstances are instructive and should not escape our notice.

As President Nelson points out there are multiple ways to interpret the name Israel. It is my understanding that ancient Hebrew often leaves room for multiple word orders and meanings. The King James Version offers up the interpretation “for as a prince hast thou power with God and with men, and hast prevailed.” (Gen 32:28) This interpretation seems to emphasize that Jacob went toe to toe with the Almighty and demanded and won a blessing. I think this interpretation is unsatisfying. It emphasizes the conflict between God and man, and teaches the exact opposite lesson we are taught so many other times in history and scripture. In this interpretation Jacob is blessed for embracing rather than putting off “The Natural Man”. 

Also it’s not exactly true. I’m not so sure the guy who limps away with the dislocated hip actually “prevailed” in any generally accepted sense of the word. True he struggled all night before this happened. The prolonged nocturnal wrestle seems to me to be a sign of a patient God who honors our agency and humors us in our childish struggles and waits until our temper tantrums are complete and we’re ready to listen. Additionally, Jacob doesn’t receive the blessing he seeks until AFTER he relents. While he fought all night and struggled in vain he was blinded to the fact he struggled against God himself. How many of us have struggled while resisting and fighting against God, and only when we’ve finally repented are able to take stock of self-inflicted wounds? Surely this myopic effort cannot be accurately described as “prevailing”.  

As President Nelson says, other translations are offered. I’ll take a moment to advocate reading the Bible in a modern English translation in addition to the King James. Many of them offer footnotes that discuss alternative translations and have helped me enjoy many new insights during my scripture study. God Fights, God Prevails, or Let God Prevail all seem more appropriate. Especially as we continue to follow Jacob and see The LORD fulfill the covenant made with Jacob and the power of trusting God in moments like this.

The next thing we and Jacob know is that Esau is approaching with 400 men. Now he is in what seems like an even worse position. He doesn’t know where he stands with his brother, and now he is limping. It seems there is no escape from this encounter. He must press forward. Again I will let the narrative speak for itself here:

Esau ran to meet him, embraced him, hugged his neck, and kissed him. Then they both wept.  When Esau looked up and saw the women and the children, he asked, “Who are these people with you?” Jacob replied, “The children whom God has graciously given your servant.”  

Esau then asked, “What did you intend by sending all these herds to meet me?” 

Jacob replied, “To find favor in your sight, my lord.” 

But Esau said, “I have plenty, my brother. Keep what belongs to you.” 

“No, please take them,” Jacob said. “If I have found favor in your sight, accept my gift from my hand. Now that I have seen your face and you have accepted me, it is as if I have seen the face of God. Please take my present that was brought to you, for God has been generous to me and I have all I need.”

What an amazing moment. Two families reunited after 20 years of anger, suspicion, and estrangement. Two brothers embrace while peace, love, and kindness prevail. God prevails. Notice the humility in Israel’s discussion with Esau. Jacob received the birthright and his father’s patriarchal blessing before his departure. By custom he held authority over his brother. He refers to Esau as “lord” and to himself as “servant”. Like the Savior taught peace and reconciliation come when the greatest serve the least.

I’ll stop here to briefly compare and contrast these reconciliations on either side of the river Jabbok. Neither the run-in with Laban, nor the reunion with Esau resulted in death or physical harm. Both hinged on the bonds of family relationships. However, the conflict resolution between Jacob and Laban was fundamentally distrustful. Laban tells Jacob he’s not going to harm him because he’s had a vision in which he was warned against trying to hurt him. A strict border is established so that each could be confident one wasn’t coming to kill the other. Family dysfunction is not uncommon, but not many families require covenants and strict borders to NOT kill each other. I also think there’s a lesson there about the very nature of human borders and refuge for those fleeing violence that is perhaps a discussion for another day.

Israel’s peace with Esau appears to be a different matter. There are tender embraces, tears, and expressions of humility, and sharing of plentiful blessings. Jacob’s birthright was to inherit a double portion and rule over Esau. He gave Esau a portion of all his flocks and offered himself as a servant. Peace is made and reconciliation occur when they join together rather than physically separate.  In one encounter Jacob’s life was spared, and in the other God prevailed as Israel was blessed to see the divine not only in an encounter with The Lord, but in the face of his fellow man.

President Nelson taught that God Prevails as we gather Israel. In this story Israel was figuratively born, and the posterity of Abraham and Isaac were joined, physically gathered, when Jacob “saw the face of God”. I sincerely doubt this is a coincidence. I believe there is a lesson here for us. Heavenly visitations are not common in recorded history, but we are promised multiple times in Latter-Day revelation that we too will see the Lord.

In Doctrine and Covenants section 84 the purposes and blessings of priesthood power are discussed.

And this greater priesthood administereth the gospel and holdeth the key of the mysteries of the kingdom, even the key of the knowledge of God. Therefore, in the ordinances thereof, the power of godliness is manifest. And without the ordinances thereof, and the authority of the priesthood, the power of godliness is not manifest unto men in the flesh; for without this no man can see the face of God, even the Father, and live.

In section 88 while discussing the School of the Prophets, a forerunner to the temple the Lord says:

And if your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you. Therefore, sanctify yourselves that your minds become single to God, and the days will come that you shall see him; for he will unveil his face unto you, and it shall be in his own time, and in his own way, and according to his own will. Remember the great and last promise which I have made unto you.

In section 93 we’re told:

Verily, thus saith the Lord: It shall come to pass that every soul who forsaketh his sins and cometh unto me, and calleth on my name, and obeyeth my voice, and keepeth my commandments, shall see my face and know that I am.

Jacob received his blessing from The LORD and realized he was looking into the face of God only after he ceased to struggle against him. Israel saw the face of God in his brother only when he followed the LORD’s counsel, and went forward with faith and humility. These revelations make it clear that as we allow God to prevail. As we place our faith in him and allow ourselves to be reconciled to his will and our brothers and sisters, we will be blessed and see the face of God not only in the divine itself, but in our brothers and sisters.

With such amazing promises and blessings at stake it seems clear the most appropriate question we can ask ourselves is NOT “how do we LET God prevail in our lives?”, but “how could or why would we possibly fight against letting God prevail in our lives?”.

President Benson famously addressed this question several times. He opened the April 1989 conference with his address “Beware of Pride”. The address is one of those gospel classics that is both painful and inspiring. Painful because it is a clear call to repentance to all, but inspiring because its truths connect so many gospel principles and commandments that one cannot help but see the world in new and simplified terms. He identifies pride not as a healthy view of accomplishment, and not as simple arrogance or boastfulness, but as enmity – hatred toward, hostility to, or a state of opposition. He says:

Pride is essentially competitive in nature. When we direct our pride toward God, it is in the spirit of “my will and not thine be done.” The proud cannot accept the authority of God giving direction to their lives. The proud wish God would agree with them. They aren’t interested in changing their opinions to agree with God’s. 

He also describes how pride dominates human conflict

We are tempted daily to elevate ourselves above others and diminish them. The proud make every man their adversary by pitting their intellects, opinions, works, wealth, talents, or any other worldly measuring device against others. In the words of C. S. Lewis: “Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more of it than the next man. … It is the comparison that makes you proud: the pleasure of being above the rest. Once the element of competition has gone, pride has gone.” 

He explains how pride really is THE great sin and universal vice.

“Pride is a damning sin in the true sense of that word. It limits or stops progression. The proud are not easily taught. They won’t change their minds to accept truths, because to do so implies they have been wrong.

Pride adversely affects all our relationships—our relationship with God and His servants, between husband and wife, parent and child, employer and employee, teacher and student, and all mankind. Our degree of pride determines how we treat our God and our brothers and sisters. Christ wants to lift us to where He is. Do we desire to do the same for others?

Pride fades our feelings of sonship to God and brotherhood to man. It separates and divides us by “ranks,” according to our “riches” and our “chances for learning.” Unity is impossible for a proud people, and unless we are one we are not the Lord’s. 

Think of what pride has cost us in the past and what it is now costing us in our own lives, our families, and the Church. Think of the repentance that could take place with lives changed, marriages preserved, and homes strengthened, if pride did not keep us from confessing our sins and forsaking them.”

If those words sting rest assured you are not alone. President Benson goes on to enumerate many ways we can choose to be humble. The unifying theme of his counsel is keeping our covenants through obedience and service. President Nelson spoke of his granddaughter-in-law and her struggles when her father was dying. He used the word myopic “near or short sighted” to describe the cause of her distress. Our limited, mortal perspective is a major contributor to human pride. Humans are prone to seeing life in terms of zero-sum games: If you win, then I lose. The Lord operates in a paradigm of abundance, not scarcity. Our Heavenly Parents have an abundance of life, love, ability, and patience. Like Enoch we are invited to walk alongside the Lord, and be yoked with Christ. “Letting God Prevail” is not losing, we aren’t giving up anything but the sin of pride, and we gain the most powerful partner imaginable. Allowing God to prevail means our efforts and abilities are bolstered and our weaknesses mollified. If we aren’t letting God prevail we’re refusing to walk with the help of our Savior and instead limping along alone. We will know that we are letting God prevail when we see the divine potential of our brothers and sisters and seek to mourn with those who mourn and bear one another’s burdens.

When speaking of my missionary service I often remark the Lord sends the most humble missionaries to the most humble people and the most prideful missionaries to the most prideful people and that’s why I was sent to France. I am no expert on humility or submitting my will to the Lord and would feel incredibly hypocritical offering much advice on the subject, but I feel like we all know what it looks like.

It looks like small acts of kindness and service – volunteering to clean the chapel. Bringing in garbage cans, mowing lawns, and helping with Christmas lights.

It looks like service in our community – Volunteering at school, coaching and mentoring youth, working at a shelter or food pantry, taking time to visit someone in need of a friend, having justserve.org become the largest presence in your web browser history

It looks like reaching out to the wider world – Sharing an abundant harvest through donations, fast offerings, and humanitarian aid. Working to establish justice for those who are oppressed.  

It looks like gathering Israel through faithful service in the Lord’s vineyard – faithfully ministering in our ward family, and accepting and magnifying callings. It looks like seeking and finding opportunities to testify of gospel truths with those around us. It looks like indexing records so family history and temple work can be done. 

And if I may step onto a professional soapbox briefly – It looks like accepting an inconvenient and uncomfortable practice like wearing a mask even though you are healthy in an effort to protect those who are at higher risk. 

We have many great examples in our history, homes, and ward family. We have the gift of the Holy Ghost to inspire our thoughts, plans, and actions. If we seek to be humble, the Lord will lead us.  

When we are humble and allow God to prevail we are comforted in trial, and blessed with revelation. In this comfort and these revelations we see the face of God figuratively, and are assured someday to do so literally. When we serve and allow God to prevail we are filled with light, love, and ability, some call it charity, we see the face of God in our brothers and sisters and we gather Israel, build Zion, and prepare the celestial kingdom.

It is my prayer that as we wrestle with our own trials, imperfections and conflicts that we can learn from Jacob’s experience and allow the LORD to prevail in our lives, homes, and community.